By Tanya Buresh-Werby, Assistant Director,FCVA
A Virtual Friends@Home story
In a world where connections often come and go, Friendship Circle of Virginia is a place where friendships are nurtured, cherished, and celebrated.
The story of Allie, Gates, and Mikal is a testament to the power of lasting friendship and it highlights one of our main tenants at Friendship Circle – that everyone benefits equally.
For Amanda, Allie’s mother, the journey with Friendship Circle began years ago.
While her older children found solace and camaraderie within the circle, it was Allie who found a true connection amidst the challenges she faced due to her life-threatening illnesses and medical complications.”
“Allie has a slew of life-threatening illnesses and medical complications. Everyday life is a struggle. She has spent more days in the hospital in her 14 years than she has in a classroom. Because of her medical struggles, she can’t participate the same way as her peers and at 14 she isn’t on the same level socially as her peers in school, “shared Amanda.
Amanda reflects on the journey that started when Allie was just 5 or 6 years old.
Through the challenges of moving and coping with Allie’s medical complexities, Friendship Circle remained a constant source of support. Gates and Mikal entered Allie’s life four years ago at a pivotal moment, becoming more than just volunteers—they became cherished friends who understand and uplift her in ways that only true companions can with weekly phone calls and meeting up at Friendship Circle events.
Amanda mentioned that “They call every week. They’re engaged on that phone call for an hour or more every time. Gates and Mikal are able to connect with Allie. They encourage her and she receives them in a way that I, as her mother, can not.”
Allie’s perspective on her friendship with Gates and Mikal is a testament to the depth of their connection.
Despite the physical distance and the trials of her health conditions, their weekly phone calls have become a highlight, filled with shared secrets, laughter, and genuine camaraderie.
For Allie, Gates and Mikal are not just friends; they are lifelines, providing comfort and joy in the midst of adversity.
He mother noted, “If you talk to Allie, you’ll learn that Gates and Mikal are her best friends. She shares secrets and giggles like any 14-year-old girl. The phone call on Sunday evening with Gates and Mikal is a highlight of her life. She sets an alarm and she eagerly waits for the phone to ring. I often find myself listening to the phone call, not for the content of the discussion, but because of the amount of giggles I hear coming from her room. You can’t help but smile.”
For Mikal, joining the Friendship Circle as a Teen Friend was initially a gesture to stay connected during uncertain times.
However, what she found was far beyond her expectations. The bond she shares with Allie goes beyond the boundaries of service, evolving into a friendship that enriches both their lives. Mikal’s admiration for Allie’s resilience and positivity serves as a constant source of inspiration, reminding her of the beauty of friendship and human connection.
Mikal shared that “In fervent attempts to reconnect with others and not allow the quarantine to hinder our lives, in 2020, Gates and I decided to join The Friendship Circle.”
She explained, “While I initially intended to participate for the benefit of a child with disabilities, I was not aware of the immense impact this decision and experience would have on me.”
Similarly, Teen Friend, Gates, found solace and purpose in the Friendship Circle program during the challenges of the pandemic.
What started as a simple Zoom call blossomed into a meaningful friendship with Allie. As they navigated through games, stories, and conversations, Gates witnessed Allie’s growth and transformation, cherishing every moment shared together.
She reflected on their first call, trying to navigate playing games over Zoom, and even though it wasn’t perfect, she remembers making Allie laugh and smile and ending the call looking forward to the next week.
Gates shared, “When the entire world shut down in 2020, everything was uncertain and disconnected. Mikal asked me if I wanted to join the Friendship Circle, which had switched to Zoom meetings during the pandemic. I agreed, thinking it would be something nice to do to connect to others while living in an isolating time, but I had no idea of the amazing impact this program would have on me.”
What makes the friendship between Allie, Gates, and Mikal truly special is its authenticity.
It’s not about fulfilling a duty or checking off boxes—it’s about genuine connection, mutual respect, and unconditional support.
Through laughter, tears, and everything in between, they have created a bond that defies limitations and enriches each other’s lives.
Mikal and Gates shared, “In our early meetings, we would come up with elaborate plans to entertain Allie. However, as we got to know each other better and became more comfortable, the structured plans quickly dissolved and the time we spent together became a lot more natural. We also spend time talking about school, friends, family, and whatever else she may be excited to tell us that week.”
They continued, “Throughout the past four years, we have also had the unique privilege of seeing Allie grow up. We have enjoyed seeing the beautiful change in her maturity and sense of responsibility, but we are always reassured, each time we meet, that the sweet, playful little girl is still there.”
Gates and Mikal aren’t just volunteers that spend an hour with a child with a disability, they have taken the time to truly learn who Allie is.
They are invested in Allie and their friendship.
Mikal added, “Allie has become an extremely important part of my life, and I cherish our meetings each week just as much as she does. She pushes me to think outside of the box. Each week, I look at meeting with my best friends. Additionally, while Allie has experienced more hardship in her life than I could ever imagine, her unwavering grit, perseverance, and positivity inspire me each day. I am incredibly appreciative of the connection and friendship that I have been able to form with Allie through The Friendship Circle. It will undoubtedly last a lifetime.”
Gates added, “I am immensely grateful for the opportunity Friendship Circle has given me to meet Allie and hopefully brighten her day when we meet each week, as I know she brightens mine! While at first I joined hoping to have someone to talk to during a difficult time, now meeting with Allie and Mikal is something I look forward to weekly! It really has been a privilege to get to know Allie and grow up alongside her!”
As Amanda reflects on the impact of Friendship Circle, she emphasizes the profound difference it has made in Allie’s life. It’s not just about a weekly phone call; it’s about opening doors to inclusivity, understanding, and lifelong friendships.
For Allie, Gates, and Mikal, the Friendship Circle is not just an organization—it’s a lifeline, a source of joy, and a reminder of the transformative power of friendship.
Amanda concluded, “I would tell other parents that are interested in exploring options with Friendship Circle who are thinking, ‘What difference could a phone call for my child really make?,’ I would tell them, ‘A world of difference.’ It’s not just a phone call. That ringing telephone is just the doorbell that opens up a whole new inclusive world where your child is the center.”
Visit FCVA.org to learn more about how Friendship Circle facilitates friendships and social opportunities for people with and without disabilities via their free programs enriching lives and building an inclusive community one friendship at a time.
Please consider joining our monthly giving circle to help support this nonprofit and the important work they are doing in our community. Visit friendshipcircleva.org/donate
